Wednesday, December 21, 2011

My Big Fat Update

I read a ton of blogs, and I belong to several online communities with message or discussion boards.  One thing that drives me crazy is that people seem to think that everyone wants to listen to them whine all the time.  The one board I am on has had almost no good news since before last Christmas.  I remember them excited to kick 2010 out the door,  and now they feel the same about 2011.  If their lives really are so devoid of positive experiences then that is sad.  My guess is that they save all their bitching for these online groups.  Why?  What you write down on the internet last so much longer than what you say in real life.  Our online communications will be a snapshot of us long after we are gone.  What does the picture look like?

This is what I am thinking of when I sit down to blog, and consequently when I am feeling crabby or down I don't blog.  Problem is, I am not creatign an accurate snapshot either.  As I read back over my posts of the past few months I feel like there isn't much of me in them.  This blog is a catch all.  My intention was for it to have posts about my feeling on issues, descriptions of our brand of homeschooling, and personal posts. I have noticed that I have a very difficult time with the personal posts (especially lately).  I think it is because I am tryign to force some positive experiences into it, and, lately, when happy things are happening I don't feel like blogging because I am busy enjoying them; and when not so great things are happening I am not in a hurry to immortalize them here.

So I am extremely behind on this blog.  I will do a super quick update on the major events of the past few months...

  1. The doctor thinks Bear has hypoglycemia.  She was having what appeared to be panic attacks, but on closer inspection they seem to be related to her consumption of sugar.  We are treating it with dietary changes, but she is being a total PITA about it.  She doesn't want to eat frequently; she doesn't want to make the healthiest choices, etc.  Trying to keep he rfed has become the biggest stress in my life.
  2. Actually Bear is being a PITA about a lot of things.  In her  whole life she has only really gotten under my skin a handful of times, but lately it is an every day occurrence.  I am not sure if it is because of her stress with her health or just her age, but I feel totally unprepared to deal with her stubbornness. 
  3. Bear is still doing gymnastics, but I am not sure if she will continue it after this season.  I think she will have a very successful season in terms of winning, but it has lost much of its sparkle for her.  There are many places to lay blame about it, hypoglycemia, her clueless male coach, being so much younger than her teammates, her best friend quitting the sport, etc.  Bottom line is that she spends far too much time at the gym for it not to be something she loves.
  4. Curly is dancing more than she ever has before.  She is taking a ballet technique class which I think is very good for her, and she is a member of a competition team through a park district.  The competition team is fun, but so far seems to be a waste of time and money from a competition standpoint.  The coaches are very young (17-20), and they are completely unprepared to be in charge of the girls.  On the plus side, Curly is one of the best in the class, and her confidence in dance is coming back.
  5. She is also finally maturing in her dealings with people.  She had a very rough patch where she decided she was tired of "always" being the one who gave in, and she because the bully.  I understood her frustration because she surrounds herself with fairly string personalities and she felt bowled over a lot of the time.  Still her behavior landed her in hot water with her friends, and I was ready to send her off to boarding school for the way she was treating her sister.  She eventually had an eye opening experience with her friends, and it was a turning point for her.  She is actually the most emotionally stable I have ever seen her.
  6. Our homeschool group is barely hanging on.  I really miss it, but since I feel like I am barely hanging on I can't rescue it.  I have planned nearly all the activities we have done for the past year.  I don't mind doing it, but right now it is too much.  We have book club once a month, so at least we get to see our friends, but I miss seeing them more regularly.  Several of them are joining a co-op, but i just can't bring myself to do it right now.  The next three months are so busy.  So our friends will get together for the co-op, and we will see them even less...
  7. Math is going ok.  The girls are using Teaching Textbooks, and although I am not in love with it, it does the job.  Bear is doing 4th grade which is a bot too easy for her, and Curly is doing 6th grade which is the perfect level for her.  Some days she gets distracts during the problems and makes stupid mistakes like adding instead of subtracting or forgetting her place holder zeros, but none of her mistakes suggest that she doesn't understand all the problems.
  8. Curly finished her online literature class yesterday.  Mostly it was a success.  The last few weeks were spent reading All Creatures Great and Small.  She hated the book, and I have to agree with her.  I will read just about anything, but this was pure torture.  Curly was having a time management problem at the time they started the book.  She had several big projects due at the same time, and she had spent too much time on her new passion (more on that later).  So I had no pity for her when she fell behind in the reading.  She was crying and saying that the book was too hard, and I was sure she was just upset that she was so far behind.  Finally, I picked up the book.  Ugh!!! So I told her I would read it to her.  In truth I read parts of it to her and paraphrased parts.  It is one of the only books I have ever read that I found no redeeming value in.
  9. Curly is a budding filmmaker.  She spends the bulk of her time shooting films and editing them in i-movie.  She taught herself how to use the program, and she is pretty good at it already.  I am so excited to see developing a passion for something.  
  10. The Christmas spirit has not really been in my heart.  I went through all the motions.  I put out the decorations; I shopped for the presents; I wrapped them; I hosted a big family gathering; etc.  Still I have been struggling to get in the mood for it.  Today my Mom is taking the girls and I to the mall to enjoy some people watching.  I want to want to go, but I really don't feel like it.  Still I will put on my game face, and give it the old college try.
So there you have it.  You are caught up.  There is not quite enough good news in there for my tastes, but it is accurate.  Hopefully after today I will have some positive experiences to share.  Or at least some funny stories about crazy Christmas shoppers!