Dance Moms

Have you seen the new show on Lifetime called "Dance Moms"?  Curly's dance coach was talking about it when we were volunteering together last week.  It is a reality show about the Abby Lee dance company.  Specifically they follow around the elite group of girls that are Curly's age.  Let me start by saying that a couple of these girls are phenomenal dancers.  They have better technique than some seasoned dancers.  Since it is reality tv there has to be drama of course.  The owner/teacher is portrayed as a authoritarian, money hungry, abusive bitch who practices blatant favoritism.  They have sound bites of her saying things that should never be said to a child.  For me the bigger villains are the moms.  These women all bring their daughters to dance seven days a week for six hours a day.  They allow them to be torn down.  These girls are from 6 to 13 years old!  Still after seeing the things I have seen in both dance and gymnastics I know enough to be skeptical.  There are five families.  One of the moms used to be a dancer at the same studio.  I fee so bad for her kids because the older daughter who is 13 does not want to dance any more.  She wants to be a teenager and go to the mall with her friends.  She wants to be a cheerleader.  Her younger daughter has to work especially hard because she doesn't seen to pick up choreography very quickly, but the coach makes no allowances for that.  That mom is so busy creating drama and being jealous of the "best" dancer that she doesn't even notice what her kids need, let alone help them get it.  Another mom is clearly an alcoholic.  Her daughter is as good of a dancer as the "best" dancer, bus her mom is constantly causing problems for her at the studio.  One mom is a busy working mom, but seems to be the least dramatic; another mom is the owner of another studio, but brings her six year old to hone in on the success at Abby Lee.  She is obviously an attention whore, but her daughter is not anywhere near the caliber of all the other dancers in the group.  So really all those moms are fairly unlikable characters.  Then there is Maddie and Mackenzie's mom.  I can't decide how much to dislike her.  Her older daughter is the best on the group.  Her younger daughter holds her own despite being the youngest by far.  They never show her kids complaining about coming to dance.  They truly seem to want to be there.  So even though it is excessive they want it.  Would I do any different?

I have been working on our fall schedule.  Bear will only be doing gymnastics because it is 12 hours per week.  We have had to rearrange our entire daily routine because she won't be finishing gymnastics until 8:30 and she used to go to bed at 8:30.  I have considered allowing her to take some type of music lesson if she is interested... Curly is back to dancing full time now.  Her Dance Team practices two days a week, but that is all performance based.  So I insisted she take technique classes also.  I would have been happy with one hour and a half ballet class a week, but of course at her level all the studios insist on ballet twice a week.  She will also take guitar if I can find a place that works with our schedule.  She had to give up theater for now, because it just doesn't fit into our times...

So am I any better than these psycho moms on the show?  I'd like to think so because both my kids know that although I am proud of their accomplishments at dance and gymnastics, I have many other reasons to be proud of them.  Also, I never coerce them to do anything.  The closest thing was insisting on a technique class for Curly's dance, but she didn't really complain about that.  Still sometimes I have a nagging suspicion that we could be as happy, if not happier, without all these activities.  Of course then I worry that some day they would come to me and complain that I didn't support their dreams and they could have been Olympic gymnasts or prima ballerinas if only I had encouraged them...